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Permanence

by Invalids

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pacmanoctv
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pacmanoctv More than worth the wait! Feels so good to have more Invalids jams to wrap my head around!
tyler :---) lee jones
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tyler :---) lee jones By FAR my most listened to album of 2022, even with only one month left in the year. I practiced the absurdly epic bass part at the end of Let It Be Said until I got tendinitis. I regret nothing. This album is so good it made me appreciate Strengths and Eunoia even more. A genuine 10/10, no notes. Favorite track: Let It Be Said.
ultrablue123
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ultrablue123 I feel bad for all the people who say they like math rock but don't know about this absolute masterclass of an album. Everything is bananas, but at its core held together with supreme songwriting chops. I wondered why a new album took so long to come out from Invalids, but after absorbing Permanence it all makes sense. You have to take your time in order to craft something this spectacular Favorite track: Mono no Aware.
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1.
Exit 18 04:21
Then we said, all cravings fed, Affixed with all we'd coveted, We slept for several days and only dreamt of our own bed, “It takes some time to clear your head.” Are you aware it's a false chore What we're pretending for, for it's strange To question whatever we're meant for What we're defending for for a change? Wait... Never stopped anticipating what's coming after everything That would normally go wrong just doesn't go (still the surface sits above) wrong. It's just I've wondered after our every goal was met What's it like when there is nothing left? (will it work until it's done?) Fate we asked for nothing, gave us nothing Fate we gave all we could Waste, you said, too late, you said There was nothing we could do, you said Your one regret was knowing it Weights you're beneath will lift away But what if you've no weights? What are we beneath? Wait... Hey wait We're almost there They're almost here Never gonna get used to the volume of the echoes How the halls can seem so crowded now with nobody else inside (we're almost back, we're almost through) Though we still don't recognize, Though we tell each other otherwise, In the end there is so often permanence in our goodbyes (we're almost through, come back through) I packed everything and put it in different rooms Put a blanket over the corners so you won't scrape it when you move I guess that'll do Oh and one other thing, feel free to take anything (I'll see you soon) All I ask is if you do, just put it to good use (I'll think of you) Now how we wanted to get out Without turning around to retrace Clever enough we won't get stuck But we've got dumber luck So we wait...
2.
Tethered 04:43
If you don’t know by now What’s the matter again? There was a loss, it didn’t connect I guess then you’ll never know Light broke through the window It never leaves you now Just tracing circles And I could get up soon, But then I’ll still have to face it There was an atrophe The arms that we used to pull us free Stay, I’ll be down right away Thought about all you’ll never know It’s been so long Thought about how much still hasn’t changed Romanticized the orange sky But I’ve seen a sunrise a dozen times If you don’t want to try, it’s alright Then when everything came back to us There was no end to our recolection Awkward placement in our Far-more-awkward scenes Took a job in your misery Cause you knew that’s where she would be (Look at you, she’ll be ready soon) She left, and so you wanted to leave And you messaged her coming clean And then she said that she’d rather be with (Then she flew to) The best friend of her brother Who said he loved her Say, do you feel so grown the way you are, Do you ever fear you’ll never feel that way again? I guess that’s what it’s supposed to be like Things that kept us up at night All that anchored us can never have that weight again So it came and went Rope we’re tethered to, bound by its fraying end Then you looked at me So credibly you said You’re looking through a lense Back then you couldn’t wait for this all to end Though there’s nothing we can learn Giving nothing in return A pain we earn so why repeat it? (don’t rely on your eyes to inform you When you know how easily they misinterpret the light So focus on what we’ve measured repeatedly) (dreamed again the other day A fleeting thought, uneven shape Thought you might see her there An eager pace, an empty chair So why repeat it?) (said you came intent to say Content to always stay the same The friends you made and pushed away The price you paid so why repeat it?) Final descent, sheets for a different bed Everything we said still ended in an argument Then the ill would end And then again The cracks that would form We’d fill, we’d mend, we’d fix But there was permanence in our reluctance What if we just watch them leak As we lie in wait until the rain came Some day We’ll watch above as the ceiling bows and breaks free Day dreams we’ll be repeating If you don’t know by now You’ll never know
3.
Asystole 03:56
When we looked beneath us The ground was no longer there How long had it been? (how long without it? Had it ever been under us then?) Our hands would meet then pull away Couldn't keep the thoughts from coming back Of us and everyone you meet And what your last words will be And you were sure it would be something you wouldn't mean Hushed by the sound of your asystole Then at peace When we looked beside us (not now) Bedside, the breathing machine Not quite how we thought it would be (knotted around you How hard it was to see) Does it feel like We're watching ourselves on camera? (recurring scenes) Even if we plead with the screen No matter how many times we Offered ourselves something (a solution) There was permanence in our resignation No argument No new direction No revision Changed our mistakes We did it the same way It turned out the same way It always ends the same And nothing ever changed Hand on my shirt sleeve There was something you couldn't say There was some place you couldn't stay Lowering your voice you said You want this all to end You wanted everyone to go away (stall, you said, rainfall, you said, the only thing) (what now, still, you said, be still, you said, rainfall) Felt painted on the walls A form unfilled just faintly traced Only several days Start to fade away (your weights will lift away) Suddenly Only shade remained Void of what Gave your mark its shape (your body lifts away) Further down As you drift away Floating on Further floating until Nothing (you're making a mistake) Reaches anymore Only rainfall Rainfall
4.
Tell the one you used to tell Tell the one where in the end Two lost people find each other (on and on) Tell us the one where they're together Tell us the one where we could see Ourselves in that very situation (on and on) Tell us the one where out of nowhere Something went wrong and you weren't Sure if you could make it out of this one Tell us the one where we recover Tell us the one where all we did Actually made a difference (your cadence slowed The lights down low Setting made a difference) Tell the one where we all Make it to a better place You never believed it, did you? I wanted to make it true Though we never heard how it all ends We both dreamt it the same Your penumbra crept beneath the door A dull unechoed form (reflected on the floor) You didn't know I saw you standing there (I didn't sleep at all) Before your mirror Do you ever watch until The other body moves in spite of you Statue still Always they'd watch you Always they'd watch you And even in the absence of light Middle of the night (like tonight) If you let your eyes adjust (tell us what you see) You can see it watching, staring, waiting for you And even through our affirmations (there's no path through) Even though we honestly prefer the illusion, There is a permanence in our despair I take your arms and shake you from your sleep I tell the one where one by one they came to visit you (breathe in) I tell the one where you had just imagined it (breathe out) I tell you the one where I will never ever ever go away I tell them all but you don't care to hear it And you turned away
5.
Started for no apparent reason Tried to conceal it so no one would witness The stains it would leave on my white shirt sleeve Keep it secret Tried misdirection but noone believed it Tried to present an alternate scheme But all in all they sent me to the nurse again Time to prepare for steps you’ve not been taking Breathe a deep breath while I listen here Still terrified of taking off my shirt again All I wanted was to disintegrate They managed to take our picture Peeling back the yearbook cover Seeing our own stature We held our peace Hey is everything okay? Haven’t talked in several days Keep it secret We went back the way we came If we bury the seed in the ground Adhering to the proper sequence Then the torrent came Then it swelled with rage Then it split and splayed Into pieces Did we even feed it Did it even matter? We’re marked by the scene Even if it’s only in a dream (simple pattern weighted toward) Disaster follows after me Then she came Keep it secret Then did you know, he said, did you know They had to keep the school from burning down again So they had installed asbestos under the tile on the floor Then he said, then he said If you breathe If you breathe the dust kicking up You’ll come down with a disease Everything’s alright, you spent several hours last night Pulling all your posters down then putting them Back in their place, exactly the same way But now everything’s fine, you’re calling just to say Everything’s alright, an ill refined to Conceal our bandages from whom they’ll hurt the most Even though we want them to know, to see There was permanence in our deceit So the vessel flows To crash and capsize and roll us over We take no witness, take no heed of faith For we just want to suffer from a storm we know Still ashamed of callousing hands, Ashamed of the shape, the way they used to be (roll us over, keep its secret) Underneath Steel surface Secretly we Bleed
6.
Pareidolia 05:42
All that I remember Turning over Static tone, an airlock door An echo of a kindness I would know You had sunk against the wall We were motionless We were in the scene Unaware of its meaning At action I would go You authored an instruction A catalogue of everything you left Before you could do If you could let me try If you could give me time I can make things right A letter returned to sender (we tried) I had offered its destruction ‘Cause everything reminds us of us still Stuck and trying not to grow The quiet way we let go Echoed back An ire I would know Then again again again again Again I guess it was me But we couldn't know its futility The time I spent just to get just as ill again I don't have the words, I don't feel right (The time always eludes us now Always escapes somehow I want to go, I know, I don't feel right) Everyone is waiting Everyone is staring Everyone's aware, just give them something Fine, we lied, okay with it Unloved, unseen, but There was permanence in our desire to be Then I caught it A reflection I don't know Up at night, rewind the replay and overanalyze It didn't do you any good did it? Besides, the datapoints never seemed to Actuallize a change, a benefit You tried to emulate what you thought the rest were like But everyone seemed to overemphasize The feelings we're all supposed to get Regret It didn't fit it didn't fit it didn't Sit right that everyone's supposed to have this Insight, with no developmental fist fight You walk on the set so unprepared to face the stage lights Words never even read let alone memorized Fed the lines in time but it doesn't sound like something I would say I really tried to make us all believe it But they all could hear the way I hesitated when I spoke No getting over it Things aren't the same now I just need Some more Time All that I can remember now A tidal vertigo An empty row A silence I would know A departure A deduction Reliant on devices never intended Brace the fall Cabin lights fading as it scrapes the hull (a violence I would know) Pace your crawl The water's coming in already half full Even though Surrounded by ocean inescapable (a rescue wouldn't show) Dreamed a kindness I will know
7.
Overgrowth 04:57
You crushed its feathers in your palm What used to bend the light to once a brilliant green (the way it was would disappear) Lay lifeless there, pale and hollow To preserve it, you would learn to be more careful And so delicately one by one Though it could no longer fly (although it didn't disappear) It paid for its beauty backwards And we never tried to stop it There was a prayer song sung Echoed from beneath us And back again Moments that felt meaningless I guess every time they hid some closet culture Now then if it comes again Can we recognize its structure when it happens? See, we can go back now if you want Can we, back to when we were okay? There's a house set over the lake The lights are never on Just promise not to go there Promise not to go there Tried to stop it, the winds that swept us over Stop it, the measurements of what it cost For although we've grown, There's a permanence in what we've lost We could never stop it Bleed the muscle, clean and grind its bones We no longer found its damages with no feature (can we stop here for the night) With no purpose (can we please go back tonight) With no honesty No, We've more to go We're almost Almost Home
8.
Thrown Spun out of control An inch of fallen snow when you woke Soulless photos in a row How many knowns were we Ever afraid of? So Our homes will never grow A barely mumbled intro Nigh, day broke Somehow Narrow chances let go We should not be here Never over What it all means If in the end everything Penned just before throwing into the flame Is erased Know I’m sorry, I’ll be with you always. Another year Another lesson But there was permanence in our miscomprehension In our wasted attention Overtime, don’t wait up tonight Out of time Lead circuitry was breached, Bleed the memory Compare the value it reads Loss of functionality No longer indiscrete A failure to restore parity Thought all the ill it caused Was now gone
9.
Concatenate the string A syntax that's never meant anything Our language not enough for us to keep From feeling anything Void silhouettes wouldn't try To position their forms toward the light Mired and disfigured, we preferred the fantasy To what we were each really like A dialogue, a paper due (an awkward placement) Were forced to see something you shouldn't have A quiet empty train, you knew you never said something you wouldn't have When time was up you looked it through Asked to have learned something you couldn't have (you heard the sound, the crowd, and everyone was there Behind the door, they waited for you Hushed, the flash, the light, "surprise!" By yourself again You held the last regret you're ever gonna) Slow our bones will calcify A giant flash of light A stroke of midnight Maybe it's finally time to do all you wanted to (I don't mind) Your nighrtmares consistently coming true (then again, again, again) Then, remember the time we spent Remember together in stride and step The weights overhead felt like nothing (remember the incident) The faint, the fall, the scan, could be nothing (nothing we could do) (would be lovely to see you again) I couldn't make it function (I couldn't get it open) Wait with me Almost done Everyone will leave you Even if you stay Always been a fix, there had always been a way Do you still deny whom you've been lying to? Didn't know a thing we could say (we said nothing) Stuck with the choice of never trying to Clench the hand, the glass, the sand We said we'd do everything different We couldn't stop bringing up when this all would end We couldn't still pretend (our weights were back again) (the memory will fade) We know better by now (remember amassing ambivalence?) A specious reason (remember the passing of time, was it wasted?) Still comforting to believe Then, again, a photo of friends A message I hadn't deleted yet An answer I hadn't conceded yet (tell us the one where we get better) An accident, hasn't stopped bleeding yet (tell us the one where you're the center) Just keep it secret All that I remember out of order (bury it, bury it deeper yet, Do you think that your version is accurate? A recollection you don't even comprehend) Though we wished it, There was never permanence in us Don't blame yourself (don't worry about me) It was no one's fault (let your conscience free) We could not help doing it over Doing it again When everyone surrounded you, And they smiled and they spoke You craved a chance to quietly withdraw Now you know the quiet all the time Crave to escape the silence, silence all your thoughts All this time we never knew Trapped our attention, what was keeping us apart (forgive me) Neglecting what was keeping us together Tethered to obsessions that never mattered from the start And never knowing any better Hoped in the end it would matter what we said But meaning only matters if you mean it The last thing we said sounded sadder in my head Did you mean it?
10.
The book was written for someone else To give perspective on our regrets The book wasn't read Full of passages that moved us that we'll forget (something we couldn't be, swallow your suffering over again) (then we tried, we left, we lied, still inside) (done all we could do) Shuffling along to the beat of your own inner dialogue All this time I've been tumbling in a vacuum, There's no terminal velocity And from all I've learned I know eventually I'm gonna be Fallling at light speed And I don't know how it works, but with the time dilation, I just fear you're gonna be Grown moreso than me When I get home you'll have outgrown me Don't feel bad, there was nothing we could do Nothing could ever get through to you (so you're alone now) If you could do it all again, would you do anything different? Would it even make a difference? Can we go back again to the start? We sat anticipating A meeting in a parking lot So much for the future Always found a way to failure When will you finally understand it, Exactly what you're running from? So you said... Often you would open, and even more often you would shut down And nobody offered any help, they didn't know a thing Often you would look back And often you'd watch yourself again You never understood why it looked so different Never learned a thing So we dreamed of a different life One where we're closer to the ones we love (you can't deny) On and on, tethered to our past, We can't just build new roads But we can break them apart We can make them again

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Instrumental versions are included in the purchase/download of this album

credits

released November 22, 2022

Music and lyrics by Pete Davis
Recorded by Raymond Bonanno in Newark, NJ
Mixed and mastered by Pete Davis

Invalids is:
Pete Davis - left guitar, vocals
Blair Benzel - right guitar, right vocals
Raymond Bonanno - bass, left vocals
Joe Scala - drums, vocals

Artwork by Rachelle Viola

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Invalids New Jersey

Invalids started as the bedroom project of Pete Davis (with remote internet-based collaboration with other musicians). As of March 2015, it has grown to a proper four-piece band with the addition of Joe Scala, Raymond Bonanno, and Blair Benzel.

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